Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

How many dead jews can you fit in a hole? Ask hitler.

Three women are on an airplane. One's a blonde, one's a redhead, and one's a brunette. Unfortunately, the plane was going to crash and there was nothing they could do but jump out and parachute to safety. So the captain said to each of the three ladies, "You can only take one of your possessions when you parachute out of the plane." The blonde says "I will take my watch becau--" But before she could finish her sentence the plane exploded because the flames on the wing had ignited the fuel tank. No one survived.

What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

What is the difference between a rock and a pencil? Your Mom.

How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

A: What do you call a Jew with only one arm on Christmas? B: An amputee.

An Asian walks out of the library.

A man walks into a doctors and says 'Doctor, Doctor, I have a bad stomach ache' Upon hearing this, the doctor writes the man a prescription for medication and wishes him a swift recovery.

Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

you: guess what somebody: what? you: you have cancer

What's worse than AIDS? Buying the anti-joke book

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

How much carlins does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

why does one side of a v-flock of geese have more birds? Because it does.

what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

Q: What did the nomad get for christmas? A: Most likely nothing because he lives in the middle of nowhere where no stores exist. If anything, he got a sandstorm.

whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

Guess what these words are: boo_s p_n_s _ _ ndom s_x fu_k wan_er Answers: books,pants,random,six,funk,wander.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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