How do you teach your daughter to stop wetting the bed? Cut her best friends eye-lids off at her birthday party.

What has wings, is bald, and can't fly? A bald eagle. I lied about the part where it can't fly.

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea. That would depend on what time you are reading this. As i have no control over this, I am unable to inform you of China's current time. Perhaps you should look into a watch, world clock, or some other device capable of telling the time. That is not the Purpose of this website. However, there are numerous other places for this. God luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can, and only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

A man walks into a doctors and says 'Doctor, Doctor, I have a bad stomach ache' Upon hearing this, the doctor writes the man a prescription for medication and wishes him a swift recovery.

Why do you go to a black mans yardsale? To buy something cheap. Why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because it is illegal.

Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

What's funnier than 24? 25

Two Blondes walk into a bar. They each enjoy a refreshing drink before heading home to greet their family

Do you want to hear a good knock knock joke? Okay, you start.

whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

Nock Nock It's open.

Where do astronaut cows go? Nowhere. There's no such thing as an astronaut cow.

What's the difference between a black man and a white man, a white man has lighter skin

I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

A black guy WALKS out of prison.

How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

what do yo call two dog? dogs.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

Whats long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber

What did the white man say to the black man? Nothing. Earlier that day his vocal chords were ripped out by an angry chimpanzee. He will never speak again

Why did the boy have cable? I don't know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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