- Anti Joke

Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

Why did the elephant cross the road? The chicken was on vacation.

A caterpillar walks into a bar. I don't know how he opened the door.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack addiction. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And is then a homeless broke man who does not even have 4 quarters to his name.

Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

Where did Lil' Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

for keeps?

Why didn't the pro-choice, pregnant woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

How do you save a black guy from drowning? You don't.

How do you drown a down syndrome child? Put him/her into water.

Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they are all dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to get away from KFC, which was directly behind him.

A Frenchman stays and fights

What is brown and sticky? Black tar heroin.

What's purple and has four wheels? A frog, except for the purple and four wheels part.

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut? A Heart Attack.

Woman's rights.

hey bill!