Ask me if I'm a human! - Are you a human? No. The correct term would be a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q; Why to did the chef jump off of a cliff wearing an Elmo suit? A; Because he felt like it. It;s a free country

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a baby with no arms nor legs? An infant lacking limbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What has four legs and one arm? An attack dog in a daycare.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

gay marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why wouldn't you want OJ Simpson babysitting your kids? Why? He's in jail and he wouldn't be available when you needed him

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Some guy stapled it to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at it. Why did the girl fall off her bike? She was hit by 3 dead monkeys and a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

So a priest, a rabbi, a blonde and a black person walk into a bar. The Bar Tender says, "Is this some kind of joke"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did one musician say to the other? "We should have gone to college."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

i did your mom......a favor. by making you......... a sandwhich. i rubbed her pussy.........cat. she saw my dick.........tionary. I slapped her ass...........what i did.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fish, just because it has a disability it doesn't mean you can treat it any differently

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Who is there??? Person 1: ..................................... Person 2: (Opens Door) Person 1: BOO i scared u and ding dong ditched u Person 2: Actually "Ding Dong Ditching" is when a one or more human beings search for a targeted house where they ring the door bell and run to a designated location to hide. After the resident opens the door to find out no one has stayed and waited, they close the door and the human beings quickly run up and repeat the task many as times until the resident finally catches them.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Fiats

thumb_up thumb_down -23

thermodynamics?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's small and harmless, but deadly when thrown at high speeds? A baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why do all black people look the same? They don't you're just racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Pokemon go: Team mystic

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why did the chicken cross the road? -----it didnt

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A blonde and a brunette are falling from a cliff. They are going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Chuck Norris once punched a horse in the chin. Nearby people were disgusted at this act and immediately reported him for animal abuse. Today he is in prison

thumb_up thumb_down -25

An elephant walks up to a camel and says why have you got a pair if boobs on your back, the camel the replies that's a funny question coming from someone with a dick on their face.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops