Roses are grey Violets are grey Because I'm colorblind

What did Don King do with his new boxers? Put them on with a respectable pair of trousers.

Why could the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

a mushroom walks in to a little boys party the boy says why are u here mushroom says because im a fun-guy (fungis,fungi)

Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

toast points

Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

Your best friend is different from a dead person. The best friend will die if you shoot him in the head but the dead person won't die, he's already dead.

how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

The internet is the most terrible fucking place in existence.

Q:What did the ginger get for Christmas? A: A soul...jk,hair dye

Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your penis tastes like shit.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

two biscuits rolling down a hill one says, " where you from" the other replied "im not telling you, youl steal my washing"

What did the father say to his gay son? "Finish your homework."

What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

The Braves win the N.L. east

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

A Muslim boards a plane with his three sons. Everything goes well, because most on the plane are racially tolerant.

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...