What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

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Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

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Flop dog

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

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What do you call a pakie flying a plane The pilot... or a terrorist it up to you

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

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"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

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Yidi Huang lives here.

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what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

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If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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what did the angry asian man do after chrashing his car? He died later in the hospital that night from a combination of severe head trauma, internal bleeding, and various fractures.

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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