Once, one man had a horse. And the horse had nothing against it

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How do you kill a retard? Pour gasoline on him and light him on fire.

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I got a dig bick. You that read wrong, You read that wrong too.

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Luckily Captain America was able to rescue Hitler just before he was trapped in the ice for many years... Thanks to his brave efforts the war continued many more years! Captain America under ice: Why do I get the feeling I did something wrong? Hmm... 30 years later Cap: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMNNNNNN!!!!!! Moral: On ice, tickets sold out... no clothing required, ladies only, None under 16!

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How does Bob Marley like his donuts? He doesn't, he tragically died of melanoma in 1981.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile "robin, get in the batmobile"

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How do you make a black man sad? You kill and mutilate his family maliciously

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple finding half a worm in your apple.

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I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

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People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

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the meaning of life is too burn calories so I burnt a fat kid?

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what did one tree say to the other? move over

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How do you get a baby in a blender? Feet first so you can see the expression on it's face. How do you get it out ? Nacho chips!

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If a prisoner got one visitor who would he ask to see An Eskimo

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What did Roadrunner name his car? Turbo Tax.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

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A christian, a Jew, and a muslim walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have a good night because no one knows they are all of different religions.

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A black man walks out of a store with a receipt.

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Did you hear about the blonde that went to college? She got a degree.

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miley cyrus

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Well the chicken was very confused and had no logical brain power to think or know where it was going. Once he crossed the road he went into the ice cream parlor but was soon kicked out due to lack on communication

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Republicans

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because it escaped from the farm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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