Why did the fat kid drop his Mcdonalds? Because he had a stroke.

Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

Knock knock. Who's there? John John who John

What do you a call a guy on steroids? A Body Builder

Why did Susie fall off the swing - because she had no arms Knock Knock Who is it Not Susie

AVB

(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

ONE DAY THE SKY OPENS AND SUDDENLY Gad: Jews, you are my chosen people! Jews: YAY! GODS CHOSEN! WE ARE GONNA BATHE IN RICHES AND YOU WILL COMMAND US TO RAID AND RAPE LANDS! FOR OURSELVES! AND EVERYTHING! Gad: Eh... Well, actually I was thinking more like... Jews: YAY WE ARE GONNA CONQUER THE WORLD! GAD IS WITH US NAO! Right Gay? I mean Gad... Cough... Gad: Err, well *cough* suuure, I mean... Jews: YAY! WE ARE GADS CHOSEN! WE ARE GONNA GET MIGHTY! Moral: "You do not want to be "Gods chosen" people!" Btw, you telling me Jewsus was not a Jew? Hmm?

How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. :D

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

So, North Korea is getting ready to nuke the US... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

Q. why was Martin Luther King assassinated? A. he wasn't his son was

why did the baby bird fall out of the nest? while the mother bird was away a cat knocked over the nest. needless to say the baby bird died.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

Cows go moo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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