Why was the baby crying? Because a tree fell on its legs.

If you say woman really fast it sounds like make me a sandwich.

A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

wanna hear a joke? asians with t i t s

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. Just kidding! Redheads arn't real.

women's rights

you thought i was going to write a joke.. bitch

sarah taylor

whats an orphans favorite memory? Not one with his/her parents! PWNED TO ALL YOU ORPHANS OUT THURRRRR!!!!

Jackson's dad told him to "play in the traffic".

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What do you call a baby who was raped and murdered? Funny

...NO.

What did the young boy get for christmas? Parental divorce

Why did the black guy only turn left? Because he was mentally retarded and couldn't tell left from right and had no idea where he was going

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

Chicken

fart+fart=poop

Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

There's was an old lady. She fell in a puddle

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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