An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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How much does a mexican immigrant get paid? Less an minimum wage.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

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what do you call a black guy fixing your electricity an electrician

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? In a desperate, but unsuccessful attempt to save his mothers life, as a serial killer pulled her into his van

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What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

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69

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Juggling lions and breast feeding.

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Womens rights.

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What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

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Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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What is invisible, weighs 332 pounds, runs 67.3 mph, is green, and is made by Jews in China. Nothing, if something is invisible, then it cannot reflect green light, therefore it cannot be green.

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What do you get wen u cross a cat and a walrus? Two animals with very different life styles.

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How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

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I can't remember if I have Azheimer's or not.

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Why can't woman be cokcy? Because that don't have one (Sorry for the sexist joke, to who it may concern)

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whats big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? a pool table

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Why did the white man kill the black man? Because he was a racist that didn't care much for black people or their ways.

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Why really answer a question when you can just respond, "because you touch yourself." For example, Q: Why did fluffy die? A: Because you touch yourself.

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What type of vision does an Asian person have? 0-0 because he is blind

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you dirty racist.

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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A duck flies to someone's backyard pool. Moments later it takes a dump , then suddenly flies away.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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