What do you do if you really really hate someone? You kill them. HEEE HEEE! by drew and jubie

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A black man walks into a book store.

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Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

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What's worse than the unwarrented death of six milliion Jews? The death of six million and one Jews

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fish, just because it has a disability it doesn't mean you can treat it any differently

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"Hello?" "Is your refrigerator running??" "Yes..." "Oh. Well then have a nice day."

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How did the asian find his family? He didn't because they all look the same.

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a man texted his wife saying "hey sexy, how was your day?(;" unfortunately, she never replied because she got in a cr accident and died from texting while driving.

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Wha'ts the funniest joke in the world? Written.

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whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon ones a live the other isnt

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What did the black man say to the other black man. We're both niggas.

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anti jokes

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Where does lady gags buy her bran flakes ? Sainsburys

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you know whats worse then losing your banjo? finding a spleen in it's place

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There were once two horses names Bill and Ed who lived on a farm. Every day Bill and Ed would race from the old barn past the broken tractor to the tall oak tree. Bill was very fast, but Ed always beat Bill. After many months, Bill was fed up. "I've had it with you!" he shouted to Ed. "I won't race with you anymore." Ed was very sad. He liked racing very much. The next day, Ed asked Bill, "Hey Bill, come race with me to the tall oak tree!" But Bill said, "No, you'll just beat me. I won't race with you." Ed thought for a moment, then said, "Fine, I'll let you start 5 meters in front of me." Bill pondered the proposition. Finally, he agreed. They started at the old barn, with Bill 5 meters in front of Ed. They both started running at the same time. As they passed the broken truck, Bill was happy to see that he was beating Ed. But at the last second, Ed sprinted forwards and beat Bill. "Ed!" shouted Bill, exasperated. "I can't believe you beat me! I'm never racing you again." But the next day, Ed asked Bill to race again. "This time, you can start 15 meters in front of me." Bill pondered the proposition, then finally agreed. 15 meters was a long way to catch up. They began to race. Bill was winning, but at the last second, Ed caught up and beat him. "Ed! I can't believe you beat me! I will never race you again," said Bill. But the next day, Ed asked Bill to race him again. "No way!" said Bill. "This time, I'll let you start at the broken truck," offered Ed. Bill thought for a moment. The truck was very close to the old oak tree, there was no way Ed could beat him. So he agreed. They began to race again. Bill was winning, but at the last second, Ed beat him again. "That's it!" shouted Bill. "I will never, ever race with you again!" But the next day Ed asked Bill again to race him. "This time, you can start 10 meters from the oak tree." Bill thought about it. There was no way Ed could beat him if he started 10 meters from the finish line. But his thoughts were interrupted by the dog running over. He said, "Bill! Don't race him, he will surely beat you!" Bill was silent for a moment. He looked at the dog, then to Ed. Then back to the dog. Then back to Ed. "Ed," he said perplexedly, "I didn't know dogs could talk too!"

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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Why did the man go to the toilet with his brother? Because Mario and Luigi had to go down in it.

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

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like a cammel, lewis stores his weed in his back

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If you are my friend like it!

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What do you call the alarm system in a failing inner-city school? A dumbbell!

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy? Nothing. He's been dead for over three years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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