why did the truck crash into a tree? cause staplers dont know how to drive

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whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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Hi.

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buttcrack thumbs up

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An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

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There was an Irishman and an Australian who walked into a bar. There was also an American, who didn't. Why didn't the American walk into the bar? He was a midget.

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If I could change one thing about the alphabet, knd stte bporw xzuor flllle !

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train?!? The teacher is a highly-intelligent organism and the train is a large vehicle used in transporting goods over long distances on the ground.

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A black guy with his family.

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A black man walks up to a bank teller and pulls out a gun, he proceeds to tell the bank teller he saw a white man drop it outside the bank.

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Your so dumb, you didn't notice I should have used you're. Don't lie

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What is worse than falling down the stairs? Having leukemia.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? One is a sports car and the other is a baby that is not alive.

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How do you get an Irishman out of a bar? You politely ask him to leave.

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Michael Brown

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Botanically speaking, cheese can't fry bagels.

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What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

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Did you hear about Judith? she was hit by a bus!

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Johan showering. . . AWK

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What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

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A duck walks by to a lemonade stand. He says to the man running the stand, "Quack."

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a guy walked into a bar and said "ow!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried to to commit suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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