A Man walks into a bar, he sits down on a stool and begins to cry. Why are you crying, asks the Bartender. I just lost my job, my wife left me and I had my car reposesed. Ok says the Bartender, I know what'll cheer you up, he promptly pulls out a 12 inch piano and begins to play. The Man at the Bar says, hey thats awesome where did you get it? The Bartender says, a really old Genie gave it to me. You know what, I like you so I am going to let you have my last wish. Really? Asks the man, Ok thanks, I wish for a million bucks said the man at the bar. There was a Loud voice saying "Your Wish has been granted" then the room was full of ducks. Hey! Exclaimed the man, I didn't wish for a million ducks, I wished for a million bucks! Yeah, said the bartender, and I wished for a 12 inch penis...

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What the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? Theres 20 of them.

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Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

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A man walks into a bar. What's missing? The joke.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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Anything Dane Cook says

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roses are grey violets are grey i am color blind

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who broke the little boys window? his abductor/rapist.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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What's worse than breaking your leg? Finding out that your family has died due to an infection causing all of them to perish in horrible deaths

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

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Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

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Why did the boy fail gym? He had cancer and had to amputate both of his legs.

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Okay, then I am taking the last comment back then.

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Whats 9+10? Well it's certainly not 21

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What's uneducated, black, and over six feet tall? A light pole.

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Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

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N

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what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

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What did Steegers say when he lost his TARDIS? "The niggers stole it again!"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

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roses are red vioets are blue i have chlamydia now so do you....

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why didnt anyone like matt adams? cuz hes a stupid buttface

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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