Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A black man enters a bar. The bartender approaches him, and asks "who will it be?" The black man pulls out a gun and robs the bar, he is then arrested ten days later.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what is worse than the holocaust harry' ear acne

thumb_up thumb_down +11

patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet with his great grandmother who got rushed to hospital due to having an epileptical seizure and is in life threatning conditions.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

KSI

thumb_up thumb_down -59

A Weight loss service that works

thumb_up thumb_down -99

whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the chicken cross the road ? Possibly because it saw some sort of reason to do so, and being a chicken. Doesn't see the danger in motor vehicles.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a mexican riding a bike? A cyclist.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang-rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

thumb_up thumb_down +101

What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's green and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -107

A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Knock knock who's there? A serial rapist, now open up. hmmm... Ok... 3 Days passed before they found the serial rapist dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A Man walks into a bar, he sits down on a stool and begins to cry. Why are you crying, asks the Bartender. I just lost my job, my wife left me and I had my car reposesed. Ok says the Bartender, I know what'll cheer you up, he promptly pulls out a 12 inch piano and begins to play. The Man at the Bar says, hey thats awesome where did you get it? The Bartender says, a really old Genie gave it to me. You know what, I like you so I am going to let you have my last wish. Really? Asks the man, Ok thanks, I wish for a million bucks said the man at the bar. There was a Loud voice saying "Your Wish has been granted" then the room was full of ducks. Hey! Exclaimed the man, I didn't wish for a million ducks, I wished for a million bucks! Yeah, said the bartender, and I wished for a 12 inch penis...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? It depends on if the person has a lightbulb of the correct size and wattage...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar. What's missing? The joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

ethan skov ex gf looked like a bull mastifs ring piece

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops