GUYS! I GOT AN A IN MY PIANO EXAM!!!!!

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

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what do you say to a black man with a Porsche? "hey man, i like your car."

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what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 raped and murdered 8.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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What's purple and eats rocks? Scientists are still looking into this question.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

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I have a sandwich and chips for lunch! But instead of a sandwich I have macaroni, and instead of chips I have no friends.

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Why did the black man jump off the cliff? He was in a spiraling depression due to recently being laid off at work, his troubled home life, and the recent death of his sister.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

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What's better than a worm in your apple? No worms in your apple.

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A man and a dog were sitting on a hill, the dog says to the man "Nice weather we are having today isn't it?" The man then goes insane because dogs can't talk, then later commits suicide from depression caused by his wife leaving him.

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He nearly died, and was diagnosed with numerous dietary problems.

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What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

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Yo mom's so fat, she's overweight !

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What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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Nobody cares.

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Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had cancer.

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How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops