Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths and thus suffered from survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

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Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

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What did the Ocean say to the Sky? Nothing, it just waved.

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What do you call a unicorn without a horn? A horse.

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A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

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What did the white guy said to the black guy, when he stepped on his foot? Excuse me.

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A: how do u wake up lady gaga? B: you poke her face

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Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

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have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

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Women Voting

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What percentage of her brain does Sarah Palin use? 100%. That humans use only 10 or 30% of their brains is a myth.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue A Face Like Yours Belongs In The ZOO. :o

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omg this doesn't work 1.hold breath for 5 minutes 2.die it doesn't work cause you would just knock yourself unconconsiuse and your body will start breathing for you again until you wake up

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Joay impistato is a fig

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hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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