how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

Black people. They are so kind.

How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

Josh Hamilton walks into a bar.

why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

Fire extinguishers are sexy.

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

what does adolf hitler and jewish people have in common? they *** and **** but **** will always **** that hard but **** is ****** up rather ******, and they don't eat bacon

Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

What's the funniest part about this site? You're alone and reading this joke instead of getting a date.

What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

What's worse than finding twelve dead babies nailed to a tree? One living baby nailed to twelve trees.

How do you kill the President of the United States? Your name has been reported to the authorities.

Joay impistato is a fig

Are you understanding any of this caboose? I think so, that guy is really a robot and you his boy friend so that makes you.................a gay robot. yes i am a gay robot. -_-

Yeah? You like that? Its like art for some.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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