guy walks into a bar a metal bar ouch

Whats the worse than dieing of cancer, dieing alone and having AIDS

Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shot in the face by a shotgun that shoots fireworks that explodes into chainsaw bullets.

A cow walks into a store. The clerk asks "how may i help you sir?" The cow says "Im a cow stupid!" and storms out.

Why did Jane scared of the video about a clown dancing in the room? Because it was her room.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

Who can you NOT apply the term "Gentle Giant" to? Dwarfs.

The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

What do you call a blond british girl a blond britishngirl

If I get 100 likes by tomorrow I will send 100 dollars to who ever likes it if the put down their address and say its for Louis Ok?

Its april fools day and a women is in labour and has to rush to the hospital. Her husband couldn't make it so it is just the doctor and her in the delivery room. 4 hours of labour go by and complications arise. 12 hours later she gives birth toa beautiful baby boy. The doctor wipes the baby off and goes to hand it to her but then suddenly pulls it back and kicks it a cross the room. The mother screamed "my baby boy!" and the doctor smiles and says "April fools! It was already dead!"

What did one German man say to the other? Wo ist das Badezimmer?

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

whats harder than watching a dog get hit by a bus? my boner..

Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? One is alive meanwhile the other is an object full of solid waste.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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