A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the difference between red hair and black hair? Redheads vs. blackheads

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Does this napkin chloroform?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? The video game he really wanted.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man walked into a bar and said, oppa gangnam style That man is now dead

thumb_up thumb_down +14

whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

¸Knock Knock whos there Penis penis who your family has penis cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Ok, I'll go ask someone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

women playing football?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

thumb_up thumb_down +12

GIRLS that think they can out-drink MEN.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between a computer and a television?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops