How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

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What is brown and sticky? A Stick

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What is Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin'

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What did Squidqard say to Spongebob? Shut up.

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friend: whats in the box? me: shhhh, its your mom... im saving her for later.

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

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Q: What did the casual mathematician discover at the end of his vivid rainbow of dreams (Question mark- key`s screwed) A: Enough dirt to fill 3141592+ treasure chests to the brim.

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What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

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It's kind of hard to die when you're in a freezer.

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An illegal Mexican immargrant was deported for the selling an use of marijuana. the sad part is this happens everyday

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

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A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

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When god hands you lemons .. you find a new god.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Drowning.

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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Roses are red violets are blue you're the middle child no one cares about you

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Whats Black and hangs from a tree? A Tire(:

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding, he can't walk.

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A blonde walked into a phone pole.

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Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

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Why did the Nigger fuck shit? He was a shit fucking Nigger.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well neither has he.

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Wanted: A tall, well built woman with good reputation, who can cook Frog's legs, who appreciates a good Fuc- shia garden, classical music and tal- king with out getting too serious. Now read only lines 1,3, and 5

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops