An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street, Paddy says to Murphy, "Alright Murphy? How's the kids?" Murphy says to Paddy, "Not bad, thanks."

A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

Two blondes walk into a bar. There is a fat man there, but nobody talks to him

As if it helps your self esteem: Nothing yet, Be the first to comment.

What's green and has wheels? Green cars.

What do you call a blind, crippled, child? Unlucky.

What's the difference between two black people? Ones a little mocha caramel.

Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

A baby seal walks into a club...

your mom is so gay that...wrong, a homosexual women is considered a lesbian.

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

- Knock Knock - who's there? - Gestapo! open the door!

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she got shot in the heart with a bolt action sniper rifle and died.

So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

What did the gay man order at Starbucks? Delicious, handcrafted beverages and great-tasting food. The secret to making life better.

What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

An Irishman, a Mexican and an American sit a test. They all pass.

whats worse than stubbing your toe? being gang raped and then killed

Flab

Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

blind man walks into a . . . .. .

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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