A recently engaged couple are having sex. The man finishes in just under 3 minutes as usual. The woman then says "I love you" because they've been together for over 2 years and they care for each other very deeply.

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This is my joke. funny

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I have to tell you something. What? I just told you something.

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Your mom is so dumb that she doesn't get this joke

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hey bill!

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Why was Jim gay? Because he liked penis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC.

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WILSON!!!!!!!!!

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Whats worse than finding a black man in your bed? After you sleep with him, he tells you he has AIDS.

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2 muffins are in the oven. After about 15 minutes, they both died.

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What starts with P and ends in O-R-N? Popcorn.

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A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says Why the bloody face? The shark replies by saying my wife beat me with a stick. Considering that sharks cant talk, the bartender ends up going to the doctor to see if he may be dillousinal.

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What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? Fix it, call a repair man, call the landlord, do the dishes by hand or don't do them at all... your options are endless.

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A blonde, brunette and a redhead are taken captive by a native tribe. They didn't survive the encounter.

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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why was the woman making a sandwich in the kitchen? because at the age of 3 she faced the hard reality of being nothing more in life then serving her husband to the day she die

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

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Q. If you have $5, and a friend has $5, then how much money do you both have? A. You both have $5.

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how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

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what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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man: so where did you two meet? man tied to flower: in the produce section.

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your moms so fat... she ways like 300 pounds.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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