You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

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Why don't women need watches? Because they have clocks on their cell phones because they have jobs outside of the house and are INDEPENDENT WOMEN! MEN DO NOT DEFINE THEM!

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Hey, we're both lawyers.

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8=D

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Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

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What's so funny about a heart attack? It's not kidney failure..

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What's the difference between two black people? Ones a little mocha caramel.

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what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

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What's the difference between me and a ghost? Ghosts aren't Dolphins!

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Why Was my mommy gone last night? -cause I ****ed her

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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The 19th Amendment

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Why did the boy hate his bicycle and soccer ball he got for Christmas? The boy didn't have legs. He also hated sports. By the way he was black but that doesn't matter, he still hated sports. Who in the right mind would give a cripple inappropriate toys? Probably a racist Santa Claus. Oh by the way, Santa Claus is not real. So did they return the presents after the boy found out what it was? Yes, and it turns out the boy got a guitar and piano instead. Too bad the boy is also deaf.

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How do you make a baby cry? Drop a brick on its head.

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The phantom menace is the best star wars movie

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

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What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

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People Eating Tasty Animals

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What do chicken babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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knock knock, who's there, white, white who, white van, RUN!

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What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A man walked into a bar, he was extremely short sighted, after this occurence he decided to phone up the opticians to get some glasses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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