What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

wHY DID WILLIAM CHEUNG LICK THE BERILLIAM FUNG, BECause it was fun!

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange WHO? Knock knock? WHO'S THERE?! Orange Williams. Sorry, I suffer from debilitating OCD.

An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

Why did the baby cross the street. Because he was attached to the chicken.

What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

A white guy, a mexican, and a terrorist each throw something out of airplane Then they realized it was a bad idea and karma gave them cancer because they may have hurt someone

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

What do you call a man with short legs? Whatever his name is

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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