What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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What did the mother say to her baby? These little piggies taste good!

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Then there was that caveman that ordered a whiskey on the rocks...

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Why did phil krahn go to the store? To get one of those suits

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roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

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When I was at the beach digging in the sand I looked down and someone said nehow

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What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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two muffins are in an oven. 30 min. later i ate a delicious treat.

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what happened to the chicken that crossed the road? it got hit by a taco truck

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Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

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dog

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potato farming

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What do you call a black man who flies planes? A pilot, what do you call him you freaking racist!?!?!?!?!?

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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what did the black man do for his family? nothing

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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How many teenagers does it take to change a light? 1. Unless he has some sort of disablity then probably 2.

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here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

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what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

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Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

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Q:Waht did the blind deaf kid get for chrismas? A: Cancer

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A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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