the your face joke

I like the Tsarnaev brothers. They ran the Boston marathon and had a BLAST!

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Monica" "Monica who?" "Monica Lebinsky, your neighhbor"

YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!!!!! why not?

why was the man coughing? because there was a knife in his throat.

Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

Question : Why did the boy need to change his pants? Answer: During recess, the little boy was running to fast and fell on the ground. Then kid he has been bullying pissed on his leg.

Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

roses are red, violets are purple, sugar is sweet, and so are... hmmm...

So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

Your momma's of a reasonable figure and weight.

How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

Why are blonds so stupid? Because our society is insecure and we need a common denominator to pick on, so we can feel more comfortable with our mediocre lives.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because-- ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????? ??????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????

how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

Why are black guys so tall? Because their knee grows

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

What do you get when you cross an African-American, a bird, and ice cream? I don't know.

Why did the cow go moo, because its a cow

Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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