69

thumb_up thumb_down +35

The mouse and the elephant went to take a bath. They had a nice time.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What happens when you eat too many breadsticks? You get constipated.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How did the blond die? Substance abuse

thumb_up thumb_down +31

If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing. He's a mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

25

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a fat legless over weight black man called Tom. Tom.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops