Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

thumb_up thumb_down -46

When life gives you lemons... you probably just found lemons...

thumb_up thumb_down +119

What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what's funnier than Norm Mcdonald? EVERY THING

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Feet

thumb_up thumb_down -83

What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky? Chewing Gum

thumb_up thumb_down +92

So there are 2 ninjas in a dojo, The first ninja turns to the second ninja, and says something in Japanese

thumb_up thumb_down +86

why are fire engines red? well books are red magazines are red 2 two plus two is four four times three is 12 there are 12 inches in a ruler queen elizabeth was a ruler, queen elizabeth was also a ship, ships sail in the sea fish swim in the sea, fish have fins, fins fought the russians, russians are always red, fire engines are always russian. and THAT is why fire engines are red....

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man walks in to a bar, the bartender asks "what will it be?" The man says i don't know, what will it be?"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why does kelly keep going on about breasts ? cus shes into chicks !!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What smells worse than a skunk? A dead skunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't Ray Charles read? Because he was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +103

How did Jesus walk on water? He was Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the anti-joke say to the joke? Your fly is down.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

what did batman day to robin? get in the car robin.

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

whats better than sex? cookies

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q. Why did the mother dissagree with her son's choice in friends? A. Because they were a rather bad influence on him and his grades had gotten considerably worse since they started to hang out.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? Me :'(

thumb_up thumb_down +28

I jacked off over a blind girl the other day, she never saw me coming

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops