A knock knock B who's there A your newborn give me your money or I will hang all your kids

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So there are 2 ninjas in a dojo, The first ninja turns to the second ninja, and says something in Japanese

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a couple argue and spend the night 96ing each other

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

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Penis.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of celery. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the given situation.

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What does the English major do? Write anti-jokes because he has no job

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What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

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what do you a call quadriplegic man in a pile of leaves? Rustle

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yo mamas like a spider always getting wrapped up in her own cu*

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Your Mother is so kind that when I see her I say hello and ask her how she has been

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What did the anti-joke say to the joke? Your fly is down.

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Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

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Fine then, its me Tifa, I am sorry for going against your ideology, I was trying to emulate and copy you, but yeah... Bad thing is that yeah I taught these concepts to a real shitload of people Nero, on the bright side, its not much compared to what you know. Sorry for being all rude, but thirty something? I mean I never seen your face nor even the color of your skin Mr Doctor Doom, but you always struck me as very, very old. I kinda appreciate you calling me the girl with the big red scared eyes, most people call me you know, most people never look me in the eyes, not that I really blame them.

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What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky? Chewing Gum

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What's the similarity between a plum and an elephant? Both are purple, except for the elephant.

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whats better than sex? cookies

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If I just post the same thing someone else posted and say it was mine, I'm gonna be really popular because everyone is too dumb to realize it's not my original work of genius.

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A woman comes home and finds her husband with another woman. Their marriage collapses and the husband goes on to marry the other woman and his ex-wife commits suicide.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

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He is so gay that he likes penis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt a black guy ate him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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