Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest but you mom is a whore

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name-Sally-Sue What I am good at in school: readin' annnd...math. What I need to work on in school: spelin

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but you're getting too close And I'm about to file a restraining order, so back up, maybe?

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

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What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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whats pink and fluffy pink fluff

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American Idol

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Hey Caleb.

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Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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Men's rights

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What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

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Why did Little Jimmy never make it in the NBA? Because he died at age 6.

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What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

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How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

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if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

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Where did John go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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