Why did the black guy jump into the pool? Because he wanted to go swimming

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because its ears were nailed to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

you wanna hear a joke? no

thumb_up thumb_down +14

The procrastinators association meeting has been postponed. - Anonymous

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

One Big Ass Mistake America

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is the difference between a man and a woman? Genitals

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Tulips are red, And my garden is red. OMG...MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +10

a Mexican and a black guy were sitting in the back of a car, who is driving? -- a cop

thumb_up thumb_down +10

28

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops