Yo mama's so fat that she has AIDS

so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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