So there's this cup that I own... I use it to aid in the drinking of my hot or cold beverages.

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bunge cord? My ass!

Why did the boy kill himself? Because he wanted to.

Billy was walking along the sidewalk. He strayed into someone's yard. He got run over by a lawnmower because he couldn't see with the frog he had stapled to his face.

A Christian and a Jew walk into a bar. The bartender says "What'll you two have to drink?" The Christian says "I'll have a beer." and get this, the Jew says................................"I'll have a beer too."

husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

The Aristocrats

What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

Murray Harnett Smells like a dirty Burringbar Whore!

What did the convicted child molester say to the little girl? Nothing, they cut his tongue out in prison.

black people. that is all...

How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

how do you get a blue waffle? paint your vagina blue

Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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