Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

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what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

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Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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What’s brown and hairy? Brown hair.

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josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

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What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

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What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

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DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

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What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

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whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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