How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

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what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

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When black people wore their pants low, white people called it "Saggin" little did they know that "saggin" spelled backwards is "white supremacy" those sneaky white people

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

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How do you make a man cry? you torture him

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

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What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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