How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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