Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the diffrents between a horse and a zebra? WELL clearly there names duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How many mathematicians does it take to count?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Brain fart

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the safest way to tell a racist joke? Ask everybody who might hear the joke if they would be offended by a racist joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops