Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

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What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

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Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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whats long and hard and full of seamen a penis

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Tourettes Kid. Touret- FUCK SHIT!

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Your Mom The End.

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Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

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In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops