Q) How many boring people does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) One

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Whats the diffrence between a white and a black guy? one of them is black

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

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what class did Jimmy get an A in? None, he is dyslexic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He saw his gas bill.

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Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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can you pass the soap?

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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What did the mother say when the train hit her? Bad train! We don't hit!

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops