Your momma so stupid, she dropped out of school at a young age of 12.

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

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Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

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What happens when a fat guy falls ? Ohio has another earthquake.

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Kim Jong Un thinks that he is in shape. And when you think about it, he's right. Round is a shape.

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Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What's worse than being arrested by a cop? Dying of AIDS.

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i bought a knock-knock joke book, and was unamused.

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Why did single women didn't want any babies for? because of Ice Ice Baby.

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How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

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Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? I don't know, you should check the zoo's surveillance camera.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

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What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back. Then look down and realize there's still an active grenade in your hand. You've just become the joke

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

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I really want to know something would all of you like to go on Suspension for 3 weeks? Mr Goodwin

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y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Why is Brendan stupid. Because he's mentally retarded due to the fact he was dropped as a chil.d

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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