i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

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why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

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What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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roak

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Women's rights.

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Q: What did little Timmy get from his mother this Christmas? A: The contents of her will.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

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What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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12/23/2012

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call me maybe.

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

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A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

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A guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "whered you get the pig?" The guy says, "It's not a pig its a parrot." The bartender says, "i was talking to the parrot."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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