roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

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Why did the Mexican cut his neighbor's lawn? His neighbor cut his lawn the previous week.

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We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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How do you know when some one is a complete dick? When they hit the prestige buttom in Black Ops when your taking a dump. N.P.P.

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

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Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

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And now a word from our sponsors

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

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Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

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Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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your mom is so rude that she took her t shirt of and her bra of she was not naked how did she get so rude she drank till one brain cell was left

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. FBI who? The FBI. We have your house surrounded. Pervert.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the bat mobile? A: Robin get in the bat mobile.

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What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops