A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Your mom is so poor She will soon have to make the difficult decision whether or not to put you up for adoption

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hy did the boy cross the road? to jump of the bridge on the other side.

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Someone keeps shitting in my garden

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

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Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

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Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

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How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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One fish... Two fish... Red fish... I have AIDs

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Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

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your so vein that doctors find you really helpful when giving you injections

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Hey girl, do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I dropped one and I can't find it.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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What did the mother say to her color blind son when he was about to take his first car ride alone after he got his license? Good luck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops