Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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Why didn't the cab driver pick up the black man? Because the cab driver already had a passenger and it would be unprofessional to pick up another person.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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wenis

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What did the Elephant say the other Elephant? We do not know. Their vocalization is still a mystery to us.

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

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KENYAN HEALTHCARE kenyan water kenyan aids-free kenyan we dont have flies around us

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What's white and is your slave? Your computer.

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

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Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

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Q: Suzy loves apples she will o anything to get her hands on an apple. A: You guys are so gullible!!! She DID eat Tom's apple. ...... then he killed her.

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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Q. What's pink and fluffy A. Pink fluff Q. What's blue and fluffy A. Blue fluff

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Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

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How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops