What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Q: What's more silly than the idea of a wealthy, successful black man? A: A Clown

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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Neither have I

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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Why couldn't the black man be an astronaut? He was not qualified for the Job

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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Whats brown and rhyme's with "Snoop?" Dr. Dre

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Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Women's rights

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A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

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Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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