How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

A Duck walks into a bar.

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

A guy thought it could be funny to write a joke that is not and post it on a social network. And did it

What do you call an orange fruit? An Orange.

What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, as speaking to himself is a sign of mental illness.

Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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