yo mama so fat she had to eat healthy food and exercise daily

Want to hear a joke? No.

Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A duplicate joke on anti-joke.com in an attempt to get thumbs up. Sad, sad people...

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

Q.How do you kill a Zombie? A. You can't Zombies are fictional monsters that do not exist in our reality. instead why not focus on killing other things such as, Terrorists, Ants and People who piss you off

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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