What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

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A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

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Wait! hundred billions!

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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Suicide isn't the answer, it's just the solution. -by Ross

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If I became the president of the U.S.A I would change our national animal from eagle to smeagle. Like this if you agree. By Adam Chebali

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What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I would tell you but i don't speak Chinese therefore i have no way of translating it for you

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

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Why did the girl fall over? She was poisoned for being the fairest one of all.

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One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

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roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

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What did the Muslim do on 911? He weeped for the loss of his many good friends and relatives

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a blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on top of a mountain. they freeze to death and the rescue team discovers their frozen bodies two days later.

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Roses are red, violetes are red, I'm colorblind

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

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I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

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What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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