Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

How did little Jimmy survive the 5 story fall? He didn't

Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I'm blind

what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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