A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

Q: why was the cat naked? A: its owner was drunk and thought he was shaving his own head.

What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

two friends are hanging out, one says to the other "whats 5 plus 5" the other says, "you know i didnt finish school and i dont appriceate you making fun of me" the other boy looks away and walks off

What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon... Michael Jackson has sex with little boys.

Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

A man attempts to rob a bank. The police are called and the robber is arrested for attempted robbery.

If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

Your Mama's so fat she can't fit into a toy car!

Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

Why couldn't Jimmy have his birthday party at the park? Because little Jimmy passed away several months ago from the result of a vicious genocide committed by a man who didn't properly understand the affect that maiming human beings has on the friends and family members of the person; he was sentenced to jail for a fair and reasonable time for the punishment of the crime he committed in the past.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Why did the boy fail his test? Because he got shot before he could even study.

Q: How long does it take to dig to China? A: 5 mins. I hire a bunch of mexicans

What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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